@ Carolina

In a shocking turn of events that surely won’t lead to a devastating collapse later, Bobby McMann decided to score before most fans had even finished complaining about the lineup. Within the first minute, the lead was real. Scott Laughton chipped in another, and for a fleeting moment, the universe made sense. Of course, Seth Jarvis cut the lead shortly after, because the hockey gods demand a certain level of anxiety for anyone wearing blue and white. Being outshot 33-24 is the kind of defensive masterclass we’ve come to expect, yet somehow, the puck stayed out.

Instead of the traditional second-period nap, Matthew Knies and Auston Matthews actually decided to extend a lead rather than sit on it. Matthews found the back of the net, which is always a relief considering his paycheck could fund a medium-sized space program. McMann added a late one to seal a 5-1 victory, proving that miracles do happen, even if they're usually followed by a five-game losing streak to bottom-feeders. It was a convincing win on the road against a high-caliber Carolina team, so naturally, I’m already checking flight prices for the parade while simultaneously preparing for the inevitable heartbreak. Don’t get your hopes up; it’s the hope that kills you.