vs Boston

Starting with Nicholas Robertson scoring early in the first period was a classic trap. It gave everyone just enough time to think the game might actually be fun before Morgan Geekie and Viktor Arvidsson scored twenty seconds apart to restore the natural order of the universe. Matias Maccelli managed to tie things up before the first intermission, because why have a simple blowout when you can have a back-and-forth affair that eventually ends in heartbreak? It’s the hope that kills you, and the Leafs are world-class at providing it.

The second period featured a masterclass in defensive indifference, allowing Michael Eyssimont and, predictably, David Pastrnak to pull the Bruins ahead. John Tavares dragged the team back within one, but in the most poetic, only-in-Toronto twist possible, Fraser Minten iced it for Boston in the third. Losing to a prospect who belongs in blue and white while being outshot 39-33 at home is a level of comedy most writers couldn't script. See everyone at the parade—which is still tentatively scheduled for 1967.